"Tarra female you need to wake up and listen now."
Those words shot right thru me as did the familiar voice that spoke them, only one male had ever called me that, he was an uncivilized warrior to most, but he had a greater understanding of life and people than any that claimed intelligence and civility. A mamba warrior that inspired fear from the first look at him, but I knew him as no other had, for I had been his woman, his heart, his friend and the mother of his children. Lochley.
Why was he speaking to me now I have not felt him since the death of our son Lochlan. For a moment panic infused me, who was going to die next. Falon was his only child left alive, I felt my heart pound and thunder as I sat up quickly. My mind racing in every direction as I tried to focus. " No Sami, no one is going to die." At those words I felt myself relax. thank the skies I whispered to myself. I am not sure I could take the death of another child. Falon was watching over Hallena and my youngest son, the two younger ones have been lately inseparable, quiet and in some ways withdrawn, I am not sure why they will not open up. The youngest son merely shakes his head with some cryptic phrase, " Soon, mother, soon." Something is going on clearly but they are keeping it to themselves. They stay in my wagons, not venturing out of the circle of them. It is not like them to not be with their friends or about, it is as if they are waiting for something. They do not venture near the main fires, instead they keep themselves busy with work that needs to be done near my wagons.
I really did not want to have any discussion, I was tired I wanted to stay under my furs and sleep, I was feeling drained, I have been traveling the lands with Ulric and a few of his men but I have not seen anything out of the ordinary. Perhaps I was on a useless mission and my imagination was guiding me and not something else. After all, how sane is it for a woman to be looking for a man that is dead. Maybe I have finally lost it, I have heard it said some spex do go a little insane from all they see and feel. Maybe its come for me a little early. Or could it be the sky setting me up and soon I will join my loved ones in the blessings of the skies.
I felt the air shimmer and flow around me, a familiar warmth and scent surrounded me, " You are not going insane, keep searching, that what pulls you is there, when the time is right you will know and see. Remember all that I taught you of ways not known to outsiders of the tharlarion people, you are one of the few to know many of our secrets, combine them with the way of your people so that you can see clearly." I hated when he did that, he always spoke in riddles. But I had to think back on various things I had learned during my time in the jungles. I knew what he spoke of, but I have not used that talent since my children were babies. I understood how it worked with the ways of my clan, strangely enough it was as if it were a missing part of a ritual we have always used. Perhaps, it might work. "Really Hallena now is not the time for you to be bosk headed." Great now I hear my mother, are they tag teaming me for a reason or just to make my life miserable for a moment in time. "You come from an old line of Haruspex, you have children that are of the clan, it passes from one generation to another, you were born to this, now open up that damn fool head of yours." Yep, she had learned a few things from my father.
"Tarra Female, you are once more at a cross roads in your life, a decision you must make. For once I will tell you think of yourself and no one else, always you put others first following the way of your people. Even when a few thought you did not and even when the few you brought to your heart listened to voices and chose to believe in things not true. One thinks you abandoned her when you never did, and yet instead of treasuring the bond of sisterhood and friendship she chose to sever the bond. Do you still owe her your loyalty. Others you sought to bring close but their own wants and needs blind them. Yet still you never gave up, Do you still think you should offer that hand? Sometimes there comes a time in life when you need to truly see, I am showing you this now. There will be no pain or hurt spared, regardless of what you choose, to some it will be wrong. Follow your instinct, follow your heart, follow what is true and right. You are a Haruspex and you are the Umakathi. It has always been the choice of each person to either embrace you or walk away, Now it is your choice. Contrary to the bias of a few you have always put tribe first, but tell me woman, have they? Those that truly are your friend and part of you, will understand and know that when you decide it is because it is the path shown to you."
I had to rub my temples, he was making my head hurt. I just wanted to sleep, already the dreams were to much for me, they disturb and disrupt, I can't tell what is real or what is wishful thinking. The images are vivid and brilliant, scents so strong they seem to linger when I wake up. I swear I can catch the fragrance that is unique to Garyx, I would know it anywhere, just as he knows mine. That is the thing about larls they know one another. I felt my hand touch the larl tooth that hung by the braid along my ear. Then I shook my head and lay back down under my furs, I was just nuts plain and simple.
" The black larl searches for the white larl, know that in your heart sami. For a time he was blind, deaf and mute, his mind was obscured even from himself, but now the common sense and common knowledge return to the hunter. Do not give up. He is a part of you and you him, your hearts are bound. "
Then he was gone from my mind as quick as he came. I remember the prophecy of the black larl and the white larl, I had always been known as that in the jungles, and the name has stuck with me even here in my home. Garyx had been revealed as the black larl, so how could it be. Unless, for a moment I allowed myself some hope, could it be possible. Had something happened. I think back on the day we found him,so much blood, so many injuries, could it have been some one else?
Okay, now I am being fanciful, I lay back down to sleep listening to the hissing of the fire, Ulric was near by I could hear him and one of his men talking. I know before to long they will put their foot down and demand we return to the camp, for now they allow me to search for whatever it is that pulls me, for Ulric knows I never do anything fanciful. Something draws me out. I must see who or what.
I know he will buy me that time I need. For now I must focus in a way I have not had to do since the first time I did my first shadow walk.
Now it was time to see. . .
Those words shot right thru me as did the familiar voice that spoke them, only one male had ever called me that, he was an uncivilized warrior to most, but he had a greater understanding of life and people than any that claimed intelligence and civility. A mamba warrior that inspired fear from the first look at him, but I knew him as no other had, for I had been his woman, his heart, his friend and the mother of his children. Lochley.
Why was he speaking to me now I have not felt him since the death of our son Lochlan. For a moment panic infused me, who was going to die next. Falon was his only child left alive, I felt my heart pound and thunder as I sat up quickly. My mind racing in every direction as I tried to focus. " No Sami, no one is going to die." At those words I felt myself relax. thank the skies I whispered to myself. I am not sure I could take the death of another child. Falon was watching over Hallena and my youngest son, the two younger ones have been lately inseparable, quiet and in some ways withdrawn, I am not sure why they will not open up. The youngest son merely shakes his head with some cryptic phrase, " Soon, mother, soon." Something is going on clearly but they are keeping it to themselves. They stay in my wagons, not venturing out of the circle of them. It is not like them to not be with their friends or about, it is as if they are waiting for something. They do not venture near the main fires, instead they keep themselves busy with work that needs to be done near my wagons.
I really did not want to have any discussion, I was tired I wanted to stay under my furs and sleep, I was feeling drained, I have been traveling the lands with Ulric and a few of his men but I have not seen anything out of the ordinary. Perhaps I was on a useless mission and my imagination was guiding me and not something else. After all, how sane is it for a woman to be looking for a man that is dead. Maybe I have finally lost it, I have heard it said some spex do go a little insane from all they see and feel. Maybe its come for me a little early. Or could it be the sky setting me up and soon I will join my loved ones in the blessings of the skies.
I felt the air shimmer and flow around me, a familiar warmth and scent surrounded me, " You are not going insane, keep searching, that what pulls you is there, when the time is right you will know and see. Remember all that I taught you of ways not known to outsiders of the tharlarion people, you are one of the few to know many of our secrets, combine them with the way of your people so that you can see clearly." I hated when he did that, he always spoke in riddles. But I had to think back on various things I had learned during my time in the jungles. I knew what he spoke of, but I have not used that talent since my children were babies. I understood how it worked with the ways of my clan, strangely enough it was as if it were a missing part of a ritual we have always used. Perhaps, it might work. "Really Hallena now is not the time for you to be bosk headed." Great now I hear my mother, are they tag teaming me for a reason or just to make my life miserable for a moment in time. "You come from an old line of Haruspex, you have children that are of the clan, it passes from one generation to another, you were born to this, now open up that damn fool head of yours." Yep, she had learned a few things from my father.
"Tarra Female, you are once more at a cross roads in your life, a decision you must make. For once I will tell you think of yourself and no one else, always you put others first following the way of your people. Even when a few thought you did not and even when the few you brought to your heart listened to voices and chose to believe in things not true. One thinks you abandoned her when you never did, and yet instead of treasuring the bond of sisterhood and friendship she chose to sever the bond. Do you still owe her your loyalty. Others you sought to bring close but their own wants and needs blind them. Yet still you never gave up, Do you still think you should offer that hand? Sometimes there comes a time in life when you need to truly see, I am showing you this now. There will be no pain or hurt spared, regardless of what you choose, to some it will be wrong. Follow your instinct, follow your heart, follow what is true and right. You are a Haruspex and you are the Umakathi. It has always been the choice of each person to either embrace you or walk away, Now it is your choice. Contrary to the bias of a few you have always put tribe first, but tell me woman, have they? Those that truly are your friend and part of you, will understand and know that when you decide it is because it is the path shown to you."
I had to rub my temples, he was making my head hurt. I just wanted to sleep, already the dreams were to much for me, they disturb and disrupt, I can't tell what is real or what is wishful thinking. The images are vivid and brilliant, scents so strong they seem to linger when I wake up. I swear I can catch the fragrance that is unique to Garyx, I would know it anywhere, just as he knows mine. That is the thing about larls they know one another. I felt my hand touch the larl tooth that hung by the braid along my ear. Then I shook my head and lay back down under my furs, I was just nuts plain and simple.
" The black larl searches for the white larl, know that in your heart sami. For a time he was blind, deaf and mute, his mind was obscured even from himself, but now the common sense and common knowledge return to the hunter. Do not give up. He is a part of you and you him, your hearts are bound. "
Then he was gone from my mind as quick as he came. I remember the prophecy of the black larl and the white larl, I had always been known as that in the jungles, and the name has stuck with me even here in my home. Garyx had been revealed as the black larl, so how could it be. Unless, for a moment I allowed myself some hope, could it be possible. Had something happened. I think back on the day we found him,so much blood, so many injuries, could it have been some one else?
Okay, now I am being fanciful, I lay back down to sleep listening to the hissing of the fire, Ulric was near by I could hear him and one of his men talking. I know before to long they will put their foot down and demand we return to the camp, for now they allow me to search for whatever it is that pulls me, for Ulric knows I never do anything fanciful. Something draws me out. I must see who or what.
I know he will buy me that time I need. For now I must focus in a way I have not had to do since the first time I did my first shadow walk.
Now it was time to see. . .
